Chuck Norris Facts

[playingmax]

When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.

- - - Updated - - -

It only takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch "60 Minutes"

- - - Updated - - -

When Bruce Banner gets mad, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets mad, he turns into Chuck Norris.

 

[playingmax]

*Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect Four in only three moves.
*Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
*When Chuck Norris was born, the only person who cried was the doctor. No one slaps Chuck Norris.
*Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
*When Chuck Norris crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.
*Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.

 

[Blair7635]

Chuck Norris ROCKS!

 

[cog68]

Superman’s only weakness is Kryptonite. Chuck Norris laughs at Superman for having a weakness

Chuck Norris doesn’t actually write words, the letters assemble themselves out of fear

You can lead a horse to water. Chuck Norris can make him drink

 

[boydungood]

I couldn't chuck norris, he's to heavy

Sent from my GT-I9300 using Tapatalk 2

 

[rdubbs007]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OZDoNbD6i8E

 

[Martin C]

Chuck Norris was on wheel of fortune. He went first. The next 29 minutes were filled with an awkward silence as everyone waited for the wheel to stop.

 

[Krafter]

Only thing we have to fear is fair itself and Chuck Norris.


Tapatalk misspelled it. Knot me.

 

[DreamZ]

Chuck norris can read a 4gb nand using only his mind.

He also has an xbox 720 and glitched it, before bill gates was even a sperm

 

[nosherfj]

 

[nicholsy]

how many men does it take to change a lightbulb? 2- one to hold the bulb and chuck norris to spin the planet

 

[brett1]

he kills with his breath alone

 

[mrdrifta]

If you have $20 and Chuck Norris has $20, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

It may look like Chicken, smell like Chicken, and Taste like chicken, but if Chuck Norris says it's Beef, it's Beef!

 

[jligg]

Chuck norris doesn't take showers, he takes blood baths

 

[playingmax]

*Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. You answer the wrong phone.
*Chuck Norris won the World Series of Poker using Pokemon cards

 

[jery911]

Chuck sucks!!!! If Chuck Norris is that awesome he would be in my room right now slamming  my head in the Keybirpahr3ipdhebajfb3uo4bfoue*an3ioqh1p9heiodanoieneinfadafa*e3

 

[Antalpromille]

Santa was real, untill he fogot to give chuck norris a present.

 

[jasonles]

When Chuck Norris found out his daughter lost her virginity, he went and got it back!!!

 

[jasonles]

Chuck Norris is always on top when he has sex. Chuck Norris never gets f**ked over.

 

[Spaz2203]

When Chuck Norris found out his daughter lost her virginity, he went and got it back!!!

Kinda weird

Sent from my SGH-I777 using Tapatalk 2